看到好笑的就写下来

ThreearticlesofCivilService:ittakeslongertodothingsquickly;itismoreexpensivetodothemcheaply;itismoredemocratictodotheminsecretCivilservantsaregrownlikeoaktrees,notmustardandcress.A:tellhimtheunionswontwearit.B:buttheylikeit!A:thatsbesidethepoint.A:well,ifImightsuggest...thatweberealisticaboutthis.B:byrealistic,youmeandropthewholescheme?A:oh,dearme,no!butperhaps,apausetore-group,allowustoreassessthesituationanddiscussalternativestrategies?aspaceoftimeformaturereflectionanddeliberation?B:...yesyoumeandropthewholescheme.A:youarenotsayingthatgovernmenttheBritainisimportant?B:no!itisveryimportant!itsjustthatIhaventmetanyonewhosdoingit!A:inthepastalllocalgovernmentreformsreboundonus.wheneveranybodyfindsawayofsavingmoneyorcuttingstaffinlocalgovernment,youfinditworksforWhitehalljustaswell!B:yes,butlocalgovernmentisextravagant,overstaffed,incompetent,whereaswe...Σ(°△°|||)︴A：╮(￣▽￣quot;)╭A:ifhedoesneedsomethingtokeephimbusy,youknowwhattodo?gethimtolookintocivildefense.B:Civildefense?youmeanfalloutshelters?o(*≧▽≦)ツA:yes,governmentlongagodecidedthatcivildefensewasnotaseriousissue.B:oh,merelyadesperateone!o(*≧▽≦)ツA:anditisbestlefttothosewhoseincompetencecanbereliedupon.B:localauthorities!o(*≧▽≦)ツA:peopleoflocalgovernmentareeitherself-centeredbusybodiesonanegotripandtheotherhalfdoitforwhattheycangetoutofit.B:perhapstheyoughttobeintheHouseofCommons.A:wheredidyougettheideaforthisdangerousnonsense?!!!B:fromsomeone...inthedepartment.A:minister!Ihavewarnedyoubeforeaboutthedangerofspeakingtopeopleinthedepartment!Iimploreyoutostayoutoftheminefieldoflocalgovernment.itisapoliticalgraveyard.C:excuseme,sirHumphrey,butyoucannothaveagraveyardinaminefield,becauseallthecorpseswould....powwwwww!A:iflocalauthoritiesdontsendusstatisticsthatweaskedfor,thenthegovernmentfigureswillbeanonsense.B:why?A:theyllbeincomplete!B:butgovernmentfiguresareanonsenseanyway.C:IthinkAwantstoensuretheyarecompletenonsense.Iftheministerisrestless,hecanfeedtheducksinStJamesPark!ObviouslyImnotatrainedlawyerorIwouldnthavebeeninchargeoftheLegalUnit!!Minister:Non-event?Humphrey:Oh,abrillianttriumphforyouofcourse,minister.Minister:hmmm.Humphrey:whichiswhyitsafutilenon-eventforthepress.A:itsperfectlyallright,aslongasnobodyknows.B:shouldntwetellminister?A:certainlynot!B:butifeverybodyknows!A:everybodyelse.wedonotletaministerknowwhateverybodyelseknows.A:Icantbelieveit!areyousayingthatwinningatcorruptionisgovernmentpolicy?B:no,no!minister!Itcouldneverbegovernmentpolicy!thatisunthinkable!......onlygovernmentpractice...╮(￣▽￣quot;)╭A:Everythingwrongisnothavinganintegratedpolicy.B:Butwedidhaveapolicybefore.A:Didwe?B:Yes,itwasourpolicynottohaveapolicy.Theshipofstateistheonlyshipthatleaksfromthetop!